The Solitary Forager

 I'm jotting this down from an overnight subconscious data dump. It's a stream of consciousness entry. It will be edited and polished later. There will be typos and bad grammar. I'm not naturally verbal, nor am I comfortably fluent in the English language, my L2.

Given Reser's Solitary Forager Hypothesis of autism and Glasser's Choice Theory, I want to examine the typical autistic behaviour of "walking off" or "wandering off."

Why do autistic people walk away or wander off?

I'm autistic and I've been wandering off for as long as I can recall.

My most stark childhood memory of wandering off was in primary school. The "official family memory" of the event was that I missed the bus and went home with a classmate to play with him at his house. This is certainly a "just the facts" type of account. But, in the days before awareness of autism, there was no other way to explain my willful behaviour. Willful in that it wasn't an accident; I wasn't abducted. I simply wandered off to explore something / someone of interest. My classmate made an offer that the Solitary Forager couldn't refuse. It is a start memory because of how it ended ... a rather public beating for the high crime of worrying my parents by disappearing. I suspect that a swift beating has resulted from autistics of my generation wandering off and worrying their parents. Although beating children is completely out of favour in modern times, it did serve as a conditioning event. My unconscious Solitary Foraging tendencies needed another way to satisfy their desires.

Reser's hypothesis notes that we're wired for a solitary life. He adds the foraging aspects because this neurotype has been around since at least the time when homo sapiens was slugging it out with Neanderthal; ~50k years ago. The solitary wandering thus fulfills a vital biological function - we wander away from the pack to make our own way. Hunger and thirst refine our intelligent mind towards being able to sustain our solitary desires. 

What are we foraging for in modern time? I think that part of the hypothesis becomes unique to each autistic individual. That's where Glasser comes in. At all times, we're seeking to fulfill one or more of five Basic Needs in pursuit of our Quality World.

My next childhood memory as relates this stream of thought is the visit of my grandmother's brother when I was six. Uncle Sandy was an engineer for Ford Motors in Canada. At the point where we met, he was traveling North America testifying in trials related to crashes of certain Ford vehicles. This was 1976. It was also the day I was introduced to the concept that professional baseball teams could be created out of thin air, but that's another story for another time (yes, I'm still a Blue Jays fan to this day). What Uncle Sandy placed into my consciousness was the idea that one could be paid, and paid well, to wander. That one's foraging activities could be sponsored by someone who wanted services that I could provide. A hint at a later career.

Growing up in the lower echelons of the trade-unionist working class, we didn't have much in comparison to those with whom I went to school. What we did have was hard earned and treasured. I say this in relation to my first bicycle. About the time I got my first bike, I was old enough to be permitted to wander farther away from the house. As long as I was home by a certain hour, I could wander quite far away on my bike. I explored the depth and breadth of my city. I was in no way honest with my parents about where or how far I'd gone on any particular day. In contrast to modern parents of autistic children, I was encouraged to get out of the house and stay out until the end of the day. I took advantage of this freedom and pushed it's limits each day.

This is also the time where my love of abandoned buildings began. These could become my own "fortress of Solitude."

This is also the time when I staged a series of disciplinary situations to get kicked off the school bus so I could walk to school. Certainly, there were bullies on the bus who were brutal in their daily assaults. But, I could have easily dispatched them, as I had done to a few classmates previously. I was, after all, quite a bit bigger than everyone at my school. But, I didn't want to be on the bus. The sensory assault not withstanding, getting off the bus meant having to make my way to the school on my own ... about 3 miles away. There was a set of railroad tracks that made the route even more of an adventure. So, it was win-win, I was off the bus and walking / biking to school.

In high school, my involvement in sports also supported my wandering. Staying in shape, I got on my bike and hit the streets. Also, having been largely abandoned by the system to a life of academic mediocrity, I took geometry at the local college during one summer, allowing me to wander even farther and explore places previously unvisited. 

Another summer had me at the Converse All Stars basketball league. This time, I was riding my bike about 20 miles to Cerritos Community College to play 3 hours of basketball (college courts are bigger than high school courts) only to bike the 20 miles home at the end. Needless to say, engaging my solitary wandering in this way lead to me being in phenomenal physical shape. 

This would also appear when I was playing varsity basketball, but also wanting to wrestle. In high school, these sports happen in the same season. I couldn't play basketball and wrestle at the same time at the same school. So, I got on my bike once again. I snuck out after basketball practice to wrestle at the local greco club which met at the local college. Again, the 5 mile bike ride through the Whittier hills after a full basketball practice only to engage in a full wrestling practice, then bike back the 5 miles lead to me preserving that physique.

Unfortunately, not being aware of the context of these wanderings has lead to some rather unfortunate episodes. I wandered off to college after high school, taking the first offer that came. My desire to leave home was greater than any advice given to me that it wasn't a good deal, or that it wouldn't end well. It didn't. I wasn't ready to be fully on my own, but I was. I had access to a car now. Did I ever wander. I wandered so far one Friday that I missed my football game on Saturday. I completely forgot that I was in school to play football and that they owned the rights to my time. The following Monday, my coaches let me know who was in charge. It didn't happen that way again.

Several injuries, and several unfortunate incidents later, I was wandering north. This time, I was in Santa Rosa, CA. In the care of a dear woman who is still a dear, albeit distant friend, I was completely on my own and able to wander in some incredible spaces. I took every advantage. So great was my desire to explore, and so poor was my health relative to my autistic system, that it took me 4 years to complete the first two years of college.

In Santa Rosa was where I met the mother of my oldest son. In retrospect, she enjoyed the wandering and was keen to join in. An incredibly intelligent and resourceful woman, she was the perfect match at the time and we willing joined forces ... a rarity for the Solitary type. She had wandered so far away to Santa Rosa and was anxious to get back to where her. heart remained, Germany. A year or so later, we had wandered across the width of the US and were exploring western Europe. It was within this space that I experienced the first two autistic shut downs. They scared the living $hit out of me. The events of the final one, experienced whilst I was living in Germany, caused me to be expelled from the country and invited to not return for 5 years. It was the best thing as I needed help, and that help wasn't available in rural Nüssloch.

Back in the US, in and out of the hospital, prior to DMS IV and a proper diagnosis, I was still wandering. I bought a pile of Volkswagon parts that my roommate and I put together into a camping Combi. I now had the platform for some amazing wandering and foraging. Away I went.

A series of low paying and rather menial jobs earned me just enough to explore. I wasn't interested in riches, I was / am a forager. I had what I needed.

The next phase of my wandering life ties into the memory of my Uncle Sandy. I was invited into employment with the City of Los Angeles to a position very much like that of my venerable relative. First, as a master communication electrician working independently in support of various operations, I was paid handsomely to work independently in and around the city. Then, when technology was changing rapidly, I was asked to figure out an aspect of digital / multimedia evidence and became one of the founders of the digital / multimedia forensic sciences. Even penned a book, dozens of papers, and thousands of articles.

But, being at the forefront of the discipline, and largely writing the curriculum on how to do what I was doing, I was offered opportunities to travel the world to teach those who wanted training in this new science. Away I went. As time progressed, I was invited into private forensic science casework ... further enhancing my ability to explore.

I've been to a majority of US states. I've been to Canada. I've assisted in cased from around the globe. I've even worked in South Africa ... and was privileged to explore the bush surrounding it's capital city.

In creating Towcester Abbey, and focusing the vocational rehabilitation work there on training people for careers in the digital forensic sciences, I think (subconsciously) that I was acknowledging that it's a good career path for fellow Solitary Foragers.

So, as I transition to the newest phase of my life, I am yet again exploring. This time, it's the Vermont Square neightbourhood of Los Angeles as an elementary school special education teacher.

With all of this in mind, this massive brain dump, I'm leaving this set of notes to the future me, reconciling the past me, and depositing an artefact for parents of autistic children trying to understand this pathological desire we Foragers have to wander off.

Some who know me may read this and recall the events I've briefly outlined entirely differently. That's fine. This retelling is a reframing giving new information as to WHY ... trying to better understand the WHAT. I've always been a Solitary Forager. I've just gotten better at hiding it, or better able to engage with it safely, as I've gotten older.

Glasser's Choice Theory explains why we wander off better than any other theoretical construct. We need to wander. As Reser notes, it's biological - written into our genetic heritage. We seemingly ignore safety needs. We care not for esteem and affection. We care so deeply to explore (or forage) the world in the peace of solitude. Perhaps this is related to our sensory issues - the often overwhelming noise that bombards us in crowded places.

This is in no way a full treatment of the topic. Just notes that came to me overnight, as often happens with me. The Theatre of My Mind has been rather active on this topic of late. It's popping into my IG, and I've explored it there. It's dominating my lucid dreaming. Finally, it was time to dump the accumulated words into this space. The words, shouting so loudly, I have to get them out so I can have some peace and quiet again.

Where's the evidence for "evidence based" interventions and approaches?

 Following up on a question on so-called evidence-based strategies, I went down the "validity" rabbit hole. The question had to do with the validity of the Woodcock Johnson assessment when given to autistic students. I read the section within the WJ technical manual that deals with the details of the creation of the instrument. It is a general overview and discussion. It does not mention the sample used to "norm" the instruments.

I found this reference that describes the sample used to create the "norm": https://www.ux1.eiu.edu/~glcanivez/Adobe%20pdf/Publications-Papers/Canivez%20(2017)%20WJ%20IV%20Review.pdf 

Missing from the discussion of the demographics is any language that specifies that those that we would currently describe as neuro-diverse, as coming from the SPED population, or disabled people were included in the sample. In reading the dialog about how the "norm" was created, this population would have to be delimited and noted as a CV in the process. It wasn't.

There's also no discussion about the results applying across populations. They created a model of "the middle of the US" to create their norm. How many STDs from the median is my population? Don't know. As usual, it wasn't factored.

Given the above, there is ample evidence that the WJ is valid in assessing those within the normal distribution of the human population (the middle), but little to no evidence that it is valid or reliable in assessing those outside of that population. This paper outlines why: Keen, D., Webster, A., & Ridley, G. (2016). How well are children with autism spectrum disorder doing academically at school? an overview of the literature. Autism : The International Journal of Research and Practice, 20(3), 276. doi:10.1177/1362361315580962. An interesting takeaway from that paper is that one of the studies examined had WJ administered to autistic students within a Gifted And Talented Education program / general ed setting, the others have the WJ (III and IV) being administered to an unspecified population, "Of the 19 studies reviewed, eight did not provide any information on educational enrollment or placement of participants." "The lack of studies involving participants in the adolescent years was

disturbing, although it is consistent with a more general trend that has identified a lack of research relating to outcomes, strengths and needs of people with ASD in adolescence and adulthood."

Jennifer Kurth seems to be the only researcher that is focused on this area - the lack of studies in this area. In Kurth, J. A., Hagiwara, M., Enyart, M., & Zagona, A. (2017). Inclusion of students with significant disabilities in SWPBS evaluation tools. Education and Training in Autism and Developmental Disabilities, 52(4), 383-392, the authors examine the exclusion of disabled students from interventions - a discussion that I've had recently within the other spaces in my life.

Summary: there's no real evidence that these evidence-based practices work on the population of learners in the special education space ... and ample evidence that they don't work and are quite harmful. Nevertheless, the establishment often argues, this is the system as it is and we must deliver these assessments in order ___ fill in the blank ___. Given my background, it's hard to take the activist hat off.

In all of this, I'm reminded of a quote from an old professor of mine at the Univ. of Toronto - "Do we assess what we value, or value what we assess?" The WJ brings that quote to the front of my mind - seemingly valuing the assessment process and the data it produces with little consideration of the validity of the results or the harm caused by it's administration.

Now ... take any "evidence-based" assessment or intervention. Do your own research. Find the sample and the discussion of the tests of validity and reliability. Look into this data and see if there's any mention of the inclusion of the neuro-diverse community. I'll wager that you'll find nothing. We weren't included in the sample. And ... if we weren't included in the sample, the results can't be applied to our unique population. What does this mean? There's no evidence to support many of these approaches being used on us. None. Zero. Zip. Nada.

Thus, when "experts" use this term, my radar activates. I can use my university library access to quickly assess their claims. 99% of the time, I've found that their use of the term "evidence based" is a logical fallacy - false appeal to authority. They either hope we won't check .. or ... worse ... they haven't checked themselves and are simply parroting something they've heard / read.

I'll be revisiting this theme often, exposing the many ways that this term is used to marginalize our voices and sideline our advocacy. Stay tuned ... or join me. :)

Assistive technology - BeeLine Reader

 I make no secret that there's a lot of tech in my life that helps me navigate a world not designed with people like me in mind. One of those little bits of tech is a Chrome plug-in called BeeLine Reader. In terms of disclosure, I paid full price for the plug-in and have received no compensation (or offer of compensation) from the developer.

Take a look at the previous post. Notice your user experience as you read it. Now examine the image below. This is a picture of the same bit of text, but it's been rendered by BeeLine Reader.

Do you notice a difference?

According to the developers, "We use a simple cognitive trick — an eye-guiding color gradient — to pull your eyes through long blocks of text. This helps you read more effectively and maintain your focus better."

The many "diagnoses" that place me within the "spectrum" include dyslexia and dyscalculia. BeeLine Reader helps me process the dense textual world of on-line life. I'm not always in a place to use Navigator or ChromeVox. This handy little plug-in really helps.

Check it out for yourself. See how much it can help improve your online UX. :)

UDL for adults?

 In my long and circuitous journey through education, a common theme emerged - supports and assistive services were available for those under 18 with the privilege of having a support staff knowledgable in advocacy. If you didn't have such a support staff, or if you happened to be over 18, you were / are expected to be able to function effectively in a system that is not only not designed with you in mind but is often openly hostile to your very being.

I was thinking about this at various times throughout the past six months. Nevada's government imposed lockdown ruined the in-person training industry. My in-person training business worked in a space where direct, hands-on work was necessary. There is very little about what I used to do that can be effectively virtualized. Six months after the lockdown began, the industry is crushed and most of the small businesses in that space are out of business permanently. 

I tried to give it a go in the virtual world in March and April. No one was interested. The Great Reset is happening, and with it comes a complete reorganization of the Western world. The world's oligarchs have decided what's best for us, and it doesn't include vibrant and responsive small businesses. Companies like mine are gone. Companies at the top of the economic food chain gained an incredible amount of market share and shareholder value. Hopefully, if you're reading this, you're ok and safe.

As for me, I've not only lost the business but have left Nevada for good - moving back to California and transitioning to a new career ... which is actually the fulfillment of a life-long dream.

In the four months of intensive re-training to get me ready to be hired as a special education teacher, that theme resurfaced. It was as if none in the classes or events would need differentiation, or Universal Design for Learning inspired learning events. It was as if those coordinating the events never assumed that someone from the "special education population" would make it out and join them in their spaces. Yet, there I was. Here I am.

I'm not saying that each and every learning event that I've ever offered was dripping with UDL. I'm no where near perfect. But, I tried and grew as I got to know my learners. Even now, there's only so much that I can do within the LMS that I've been given to work with. Same goes for the platform that is being used for my intern work - Brightspace. Brightspace is a content management system that is trying hard to be an LMS, but lacks so much in terms of UX/UI for accommodation / differentiation.

It's my fervent wish that those who are designing learning events for adults lean heavily into UDL - and the understanding that we all learn differently. I hope for the day that LMS designers build a platform with a user-selectable UX/UI with differentiation built in. Until then, we'll plow on and hope for the best.

Introductions and Links

A bit of an introduction. 

Hi, I'm Jim (Dr. H).

I'm presently an Elementary Special Education teacher (SDC/SDP) in the Los Angeles Unified School District. Here's the introduction video that I created for this year's open house. It's important that you know that all of the opinions that I will share here are my own. Any links I share do not constitute an endorsement of any kind. I have done my best to demonetize this blog. When I share about a commercial resource, I will state my relationship to that company.

Find my autism related articles at Planet Neurodivergent, an Australian platform with a world-wide audience. (no financial relationship, just sharing information and helping an up and coming platform)

I'm working with Irish start-up AutPost to create content. I've sent over my first video (with captions, of course). For more info about AutPost, find them on Facebook. (In exchange for creating video content - about Autistics, by Autistics - I receive access to the whole site.)

My Instagram @WeeJimmy74. (I reject all influencer offers and don't sell from my IG. It's not that I'm against making money, I just don't want some corporate interest to govern what I share or how I experience the world.)

My resume site is at hoerricks.com.

I'm on LinkedIn and Twitter, though I don't check either. An up to date LinkedIn profile was required by a previous employer, but to my view LinkedIn is all corporate promotion and preening. I find Twitter to be chaotic and lack the understanding (or enough anxiety meds) to safely engage in that space. I use various messaging apps (GroupMe, Slack, Line, FB Messanger, and etc.) and despise them all. Perhaps I'm old fashioned, I still prefer email.

I've published a bunch of materials on a variety of topics over at Academic.edu. Most of the materials there are about Freemasonry, Philosophy, and Religion as I've experienced them. There are a few, older autism-related articles as well as a few with a look at a particular historical person / event. (I think they charge for full access. If you find an article that you like, and you want a copy, just ask me.)

BTW, if you're interested, my pronouns are they, them, their, or Dr. 

I can't predict when or how often I will post here. As things evolve, I may come back to edit / update this post.

I intend to use this space to save helpful links to information and tools. I say helpful - as in helpful to me. What I share may be helpful to you. It may not. If I've shared something that isn't helpful to you, and you choose to comment, please presume grace on my part and make your disagreement polite. If you can, offer an alternative and your reasons why what you're offering is more helpful to you. In this way, we can both get to know each other and grow in a healthy and respectful way.

Go easy on me. I'm autistic, non-verbal, and using this space to process a world and systems not only not designed for people like me ... but in some cases openly hostile to people like me.

:)